Meesh has worked with children and adults of all ages and backgrounds who’ve encountered a variety of challenges including anxiety, depression, PTSD, OCD, ADHD, I/DD, autism, cerebral palsy, epilepsy, and multiple sclerosis, among others. After working for various non-profits, she started ClutterBye Professional Organizing and Home Staging Services in 1998. It was in this capacity that she witnessed first-hand the known correlation between clutter and PTSD. Meesh began to incorporate therapeutic coaching into her organizing services for her many clients who were suffering from the effects of childhood trauma. While she enjoyed helping them de-clutter and reconfigure their surroundings, she noticed that many of her clients could not maintain the environmental changes or the habits she had coached them in, and the results were often temporary. It became evident that focusing on the symptoms before the cause was a bit backwards, and The Coaching Curator was born.
From the effects of early micro-traumas to full-blown Complex PTSD (and everything in between) few humans escape childhood unscathed - even in the healthiest of upbringings. The truth, in spite of this fact, is that we don’t have to suffer!
We are all born with a survival instinct that compels us to express our truest selves, which means our responses to early experiences are driven by both survival and authenticity. A hungry baby is never self-conscious about screaming to be fed, yet, as we grow we are trained by outer influences to quell a wide range of authentic expression. As our brains develop, these experiences create neural pathways which inform our perceptions and responses for the rest of our lives.
We all want to survive and we all want to be ourselves. Many view fear as the opposite of love yet, in practical terms, fear is simply survival. In a dangerous situation, survival depends upon certain parts of the brain shutting down and other parts ramping up, thereby dumping cortisol/adrenaline into the system. This blocks creativity in order to focus all immediate attention on locating and escaping danger. But what happens when the perceived threat is also a beloved caregiver? How can we escape the same person we rely on for survival? This inner conflict can prevent us from processing and "shaking off" the otherwise useful fear, particularly during periods of important brain development.
By the time we reach adulthood, these fear mechanisms can over-function, triggering a state of nearly constant survival mode, leaving us always on the lookout for danger. Our resourceful brains keep us vigilant and at the ready to either fight (controlling, argumentative), flee (avoidant/emotionally unavailable), freeze (procrastination, “analysis paralysis”), or fawn (over-functioning, people-pleasing).
As a therapeutic coach and trauma survivor, I’ve found that the simplest way out of this cycle is through courageous authenticity, relentless self-love, and gentle reparenting.
The most compatible client is already on a path of healing and self-knowledge, whether through weekly therapy, meditation, yoga, 12-step meetings, or similar intentional work. Between such practices, I provide a customized menu of tools that are meaningful and useful to each individual client based on their unique history, needs, disposition, learning style, and lifestyle. This personalized coaching and support helps clients achieve the consistency that will bring about new habits which form new neural pathways.
Lived experiences and decades of gathered information allow me to curate this therapeutic process from a wide variety of techniques and modalities. It is vital that we address trauma-response triggers from all angles. This is the essential work you do between the therapy (or yoga/meditation/meetings/etc.). I provide the compassionate guidance and support to help you get over the hump and break free of old patterns in a way that works for YOU and that translates to greater enjoyment of life.
When it comes to unresolved childhood trauma, be assured that I have been there and know personally the debilitating and destructive suffering it can cause. Know that you are not alone and that there is a way out. Believe that you can do this! You CAN heal and you CAN create for yourself the life that you deserve and were meant to have. And remember: YOU ARE WORTHY.
Meesh attended Manhattanville College, SUNY Stony Brook, and Brunel University in London. In 1990 she earned her B.A. in Liberal Studies with concentrations in Psychology, Sociology, and Gender Studies, along with special focus on Abnormal Psychology, Child Development, and Learning Theory.